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Joy Vanderbeck Ph.D. C.Ht. Relationship Coach Life Success Coaching and Training 817-261-6044 We all have relationships. Most of us are looking for improved skills for creating and maintaining healthy, intimate relationships, and find ourselves struggling to achieve effective communication and a sense of joy in all our relationships. We all learned algebra and the capital of Brazil, but nowhere in traditional education are simple communication skills taught. In working with families for more than 20 years, I have found that communication is a key factor in the success of relationships. These simple steps can help you be empowered in your communication. Nine Easy Steps to Successful Communication Joy Vanderbeck, Ph.D. C.Ht. COMMUNICATE CLEARLY WHAT YOU WANT! Remember that only one person speaks at a time. Each person must hear the other through and respond to what they have said before taking their turn. 1. Open Your Heart Realize that the person may not be aware of the impact of their actions. 2. Validate Validate the person you are speaking with. 3. "I am feeling" State what it is that you are feeling or experiencing. 4. Request Request clearly what you desire. 5. Repeat Ask your partner to repeat back to you what you have said. Solicit feedback. 6. Plan Plan and negotiate together how your request can be honored 7. Agree Agree on the plan. (Remember that often a plan must include a time deadline for the request to be honored.) 8. Reiterate Reiterate the agreement. This is crucial to be certain that all parties clearly understand the agreement. 9. Thanks Thank the person for their willingness to communicate with you.